Monday, June 23, 2008
Well I'm here to blog again... I think its getting more and more things happening between the 2 of them... See what she wrote...
就是说不出 “原谅你” 这三个字
ZJ went out with his colleague for dinner on Sat night, all i tot was just a dinner.. But, there are plans for other programme. So, he stayed behind. I'm okay with him going out and have fun with them but to ZOUK?
He just INFORMED me through sms that he is going to Zouk at 1.30 am, so i asked " Going zouk now? with who?" And he replied, " ya, going zouk le now, with the china people".. So i tot, it's his colleague who are in charge of the stock, who are guys.. Sylvia's sister actually saw ZJ dancing with girls and also saw xin yi and her bf that night at Zouk. So, sylvia called in the morning and asked whether i know about this. Ya, I know he went there, but what i didn't know was that he was with his female colleague too. AND THEY ARE NOT FROM CHINA, except 2 of them. I cried again. The feeling really sucks.. Someone told me my BF is dancing with girls ???? Who? What are they doing?
I sms him, and asked " who was with you last night?" and he named me all those that went with him and ALL of them are girls except xin yi's bf.. IF he were to tell me the names yesterday nite at 130am, i admit i would still be angry but onli angry at the fact that he went to zouk and broke our promise. but, now, i am both angry and sad... We have promised not to go to zouk unless there is BIRTHDAY PARTY or other EVENTS like his Army Gathering. He went once with his Army Friends and i allowed and now he thinks he can go subsequently just by INFORMING ME ??????
During work, i try to concentrate and talk and laugh with my colleague but they still can sense something is wrong with me.
I also typed out a harsh sms and send it to him..
After work, he was downstairs at my workplace. While walking to the foodcourt, I raised my voice a little and told him whatever i am pissed off with. All he did was saying "sorry" and "dun be angry le"... Silence between us during dinner and on our way back to my house.. He keep saying he is sorry but i dun think he really meant it.. He just want me to forgive him, that's why he said "sorry"...
I can't bring myself to say " U are forgiven..."
I give in to him by trying to give him the TIME he want for himself, not meeting him during this weekends and letting him go for soccer session every Sunday. But this is what i got...
I wanted to forgive him but i keep thinking about what happened and a lot of questions in my head...
Why it had to happen just 1 week before our 1 year anniversary?
My honey-moon is OVER.... The rest of the road is ROCKY..
Maybe this is what they have been telling me, it might be her kamar... Lucky darling wasn't like him, I don't think I can tahan him to lie to me about this lo... Scary... Why do guys always give reason as in " I scare you angry that's why I never tell you its gal... I don't want you to worry or sad... I don't want to hurt you... I'm sorry..."
This is all they can said when their gf found that they actually lie and went out with gals...
This happening remind me of what had happened in the past... When I actually found out she went to find darling for breakfast and accompany him to work... Although she told me nothing happen between the 2 of them but darling told me what happened... Thanks for beinging truth at that moment although you didn't tell me about her go find you... That time when pooh family went suntec to study and I went to find him, I couldn't really look at him and know what he is thinking... At that moment I don't know what I should do and he notice I wasn't right... The rest I couldn't really remember... Hahaha...
Whatever it is, I just want to spend the rest of the time we together and cherish each other...
with loves; PiGlEt OnG KeLiNe...
8:25 AM
